Thursday, April 29, 2010

Smart and Easy Ways to Use Essential Oils

1. For good smelling towels, sheets, clothes, etc. place a few drops of your favorite essential oil onto a small piece of terry cloth and toss into the dryer while drying. Add 5 drops essential oil to 1/4 cup fabric softener or water and place in the center cup of the washer. I like to use lavendar on my sheets.

2. Popourri which has lost its scent can be revived by adding a few drops of essential oil.

3. Add a few drops of oil to water in a spray bottle and use as an air freshener.

4. Add a few drops essential oil to a pan of water and simmer on stove or in a potpourri pot.

5. To enjoy a scented candle, place a drop or two into the hot melted wax as the candle burns.

I will post some more tips later.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

My new best friend.


I just recieved my diffuser and some new oils. This is my new favorite. It has helped me be calm and happy. I so enjoy the smell. I think my kids like me better this way. :)
Oh, and the Deep Blue roll on is awesome. I have put it on my neck and back and it feels so nice. My neck has been stiff after a couple of nights in a weird position. This oil has made it more relaxed.
LOVE IT!!!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

3 years today.

I have been wanting to write this story for a long time, but I am not very good at writing down my thoughts. So bare with me. I have felt like I need to write this down. Out of my birth stories this is not one that has a good ending. (If you are pregnant DON'T READ THIS PLEASE)




Three years today was not a great day at all. It started in the December of 06, I found out we were expecting our third baby. We were both way excited. We all thought that it was going to be a girl. We talked about names and how much fun and challenging it would be to have three kids.
Prenatal's were going good, because of my size it was always hard to find the heart beat. Thinking back now, the pregnancy did seem different. Then I started spotting at 14 1/2 weeks. It was not a lot, but it scared me. I went to my midwife and we both thought that we heard her heart beat. She did an ultrasound, but her machine was an older model and we were not able to see much. Then I started spotting more. My back-up OB was out of town, so my midwife told me to go to the ER to get an ultrasound to make sure all was well. I left the kids with my mom, and went by myself to the ER. Joe was at work and I didn't want to worry him. I know that is silly, but I still had hope that everything was fine. They took me back to a room and tried to find the heartbeat. They couldn't find it, but I still was not too worried, because like I said before, because of my size it was always hard to find. So I waited. My SIL Kim was working as a nurse in the ER that day and kept on checking on me. Then they took me to the ultrasound room. Where a young guy did the ultrasound, he was measuring things and asked if I was about twelve weeks along, I told him no that I was almost 15 weeks, he started to look pretty nervous, and I knew. He stopped and told me that he would be right back, and I knew. Then he came back with someone else and they looked, and I knew. They wouldn't say anything. I finally asked if there was a heart beat. They said, sorry, but no. The baby looked fine in all other areas, but was the size of a 12 week fetus, instead of 15 weeks. Then they wheeled me back to the ER room and left me there to wait for the Dr. And I cried. I then called Joe, and told him that our baby was gone, and I cried some more. He said he would be right there. My midwife and my best friend called to check on me and I told her and we cried. The Dr. finally came in to tell me what I already knew. My baby was gone. They told me that I would go into labor and it would most likely be like my other labors. They also told me that the baby would most likely not look like a baby. So we went home to wait. We had to tell Bobby that the baby was not going to be coming. He was very sad. And I cried with him. Mary did not really realize what was going on. We told them that the baby was going to be in heaven and wait for us there. And we waited some more.
A week later still nothing had happened. Even though I knew that that the baby was dead, my mind would go to what ifs. What if they made a mistake? What if she was still alive? What if, WHAT IF? I was starting to go a little crazy. I couldn't take it. I decided to go back to the ER to see if they could start the labor, if there was anything they could do. So we went and waited. They told me that I just needed to wait. So I did. I received a priesthood blessing and I was calm. So we waited. April 1st. April Fools Day. The night before was any other night, just waiting and wondering when it would happen. We put the kids to bed and we went to bed. Mary ended up in our bed. I woke up about 3:2o with contractions. They were not that close so I decided to get up and take a bath. My other two labors were very long, so I thought this one would be too. Just a back ground. Bobby's took 48 hours and Mary's was 22 hours. So I thought we had along time. Joe went back to bed. I started the water for a hot hot bath, since I didn't need to be careful with it being to hot. (I knew I wouldn't be hurting the baby.) The contractions started coming faster and harder. I turned off the water and called for Joe to help me. They were to coming to fast and I was scared. I saw a lot of blood on the floor and I was very scared. I was passing a lot of clots. Joe called our midwife and she talked to him while she was on her way. Within about 15 minutes I felt the need to push. I was crying and screaming that I felt the bag of waters and that it was not breaking and it was not coming out, even though I was pushing so hard, and I was scared. We were still in the bathroom with the door and window closed. So you can imagine that it was very hot, because of the hot bath that I had filled and the smell of blood. Joe was not doing to well, he started to feel like he was going to pass out. Our midwife was afraid that I was going to hemorrhage, because the bag of waters and baby were not coming out. She lived in North Ogden, and couldn't get to us fast enough. She told Joe to call 911 and get transferred to the hospital. So Joe called them. The phone went dead. So he had to find another phone and call again. They got there at 4:05. She was born at 4:00 am, still in the bag of waters. It did not break. I hurried and put my shirt on, before they came upstairs. Because of my size and the stairs they couldn't lift me. So I put a blanket between my legs and around me and they helped me walk down the stairs. I panicked and told them to be careful with the baby. He told me that he would and they but her in a basin and brought her with us.
There was a miracle that night, it being that the kids stayed asleep the whole time. They didn't have to see me like that. Joe ran over and got the neighbors to come stay with the kids until Grandma could get there. They put me in the ambulance, and we sat there for awhile while they checked my vitals. Then they started for the hospital. They started an IV and half way there I told them I was really dizzy and that I felt something gushing. He checked and they went faster. Joe said that he couldn't keep up at that time. I was hemorrhaging. In the ER they were able to stop the bleeding and got me stabilized. I didn't have to have any blood. My midwife was there when we got there. (I think she sped just a little) It was good to have her there with us for the support. They just wanted to watch me for awhile. Joe had to leave and do the paper route, so my midwife stayed with me the whole time.
Before Joe got back, I asked if I could see my baby. I wanted to do it before Joe got back, because I didn't know how he would take it. They told me that was fine. My midwife helped open up the sack and get her out. She checked the cord and the placenta and it all looked fine. I was able to hold her in my hand. She was perfect. Her eyes, her ears, her arms and legs. Her ten toes, her ten fingers. She was perfect and beautiful. And I cried.
I was 16 weeks along, after the point that they tell you not worry so much. We don't know why it happened. I left her there. We went home and cried together, and held each other and slept. I panicked and called the ER to see if they still had her. I wanted to hold her some more. To take care of her. I should have brought her home with me. I should have had someone take pictures for me. But I didn't. I had to pray long and hard to have some comfort. To know that she was being watched after. I have the picture in my mind.
I feel that I did my job of giving her a body and that her job is just starting. She is watching out for us and waiting for us to be with her. She had a mission to attend to. She is in good hands. I gave her a name, just for me to have. I want her to know how much she is loved. Bobby still talks about the baby that I lost. She is apart of our family, she will always be apart of me. Thank you sweet baby for coming into our lives. You have taught us a lot. We will see you again.

My friend gave me this angel after and every time I look at it, I remember my baby angel.
For those of you that have had a miscarriage and are struggling, you are not alone. There are a lot of supports groups online for you to go on and get help and support. And there is always prayer. My Heavenly Father knows what I have gone through and is always there with open arms. I am happy and grateful to have had the chance of giving her a body. I had to pray a lot during this last pregnancy to have faith, that things would be fine. Just remember you are not alone. So today on the third anniversary, I hold my children and tell them how much I love them.
Thanks for reading and letting me share.

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